How to pick a beach for small children

A beach that photographs well and a beach that works with a three year old are different beaches. The postcard ones have surf, no shade and a car park a kilometre away. The family ones are often the least famous bay in town. After enough afternoons carrying a wet child and a bag of sand back to a car, this is my list.

1. Water that slopes slowly

The single most important thing. A beach where the water is knee deep for fifty metres lets children play in it, not just at the edge of it, and lets you sit in it too. Lagoons inside a reef (Mauritius, the Maldives, Aruba) and long shallow bays (Playa de Muro on Mallorca, Benidorm’s Levante, Koh Lanta’s Long Beach) are the gold standard. Surf coasts, however famous, are for older children.

2. Shade you did not have to carry

Palms are beautiful and useless for shade; their fronds move all day. Look for casuarinas, takamakas, almond trees or a promenade with a wall, or accept that you will rent an umbrella. In the tropics the sun is dangerous between eleven and three no matter what the temperature says, and the beach day is best split into a morning and a late afternoon session with a sleep between.

3. A lifeguard and a flag

Spain, France, Italy, Australia and the United States run lifeguard services on main beaches in season; much of Asia and the Indian Ocean does not. Where there is a flag system, teach children the colours before the first day. Where there is not, the calm bays in my destination guides are the ones to trust.

4. A toilet, a tap and a snack within a hundred metres

Obvious, and the reason a resort beach beats a wild one with a toddler. A beach bar solves lunch and the hot afternoon; a freshwater shower solves the car seat.

5. The journey from the door

The best beach is the one you can reach with a pushchair in ten minutes. That means choosing accommodation second, after the beach, and asking a boring question before booking: how many steps, and is there a lift?

Where it all comes together

The family beach finder ranks every destination on the map by water, shade, medical care and flight length. The winners are not surprising: Mallorca and the Costa Blanca for short flights and Spanish lifeguards, Mauritius and Aruba for lagoons, Koh Lanta for the budget and the pad thai. The Maldives score highest on water and lowest on hospital distance, which is the trade-off in one line.